Blurry
by epiphanies
Summary: Buffy reflects on her first, second and third life!


Blurry- Puddle of Mud

  
  


I hate it I hate it I hate it.

Buffy stared at her mirror, which was covered in makeup....eyeliner and lipstick that read things such as "life is short...make it shorter" and "only the good die young and want to stay dead."

So what if I'm a little depressed, she thought gloomily, That doesn't matter. At least, not to anybody else. They're just going on in their fuzzy, happy little lives...

  
  


Everything''s so blurry

and everyone's so fake

and everybody''s empty

and everything is so messed up

pre-occupied without you

I cannot live at all

my whole world surrounds you

I stumble then I crawl 

  
  


And after all this crap, of course there has to be a big, huge, (hot) topping of Spike, the undead that want me.

Of course, that has to come to me wanting him.

Lovely pile of crap life can give you sometimes....

I mean, there's the birth. Then you're raised by usually one parent that doesn't understand you until it's the wrong time and you have to go out and save the world so you don't have enough time to work things out until you come home and have to leave for fear of having them tell you to get out.....then you lose the one you love more than anything to save the world...,then they come back......then.......they leave you. Then you shut down so that every boyfriend you have after that can't get through to you. THEN you find out your sister isn't really human and that she was sent to you only mere months ago by a bunch of monks that felt like messing with your lives....then your SECOND boyfriend leaves you.....THEN your mom DIES......then you die, then your friends bring you back from heaven, then two of your favourite people leave your life and all you're left with is the one sister and SPIKE, the neutered vampire that wants you and cheats at kitten poker in a lame demon bar.

Haha. He did a pretty good job at cheating though. *laughs*

  
  


you could be my someone

you could be my sea

you know that I''ll protect you

from all of the obscene

I wonder what your doing

imagine where you are

there''s oceans in between us

but that''s not very far

  
  


He could be the next Angel....you never know. Apparently there's never enough room in a broken heart for more heartbreak.....or so my experience, friends and past tells me anyway. Who knows if I can trust them any more than Spike's opponents in kitten poker can trust him to lose.

  
  


can you take it all away

can you take it all away

when ya shoved it in my face

this pain you gave to me

can you take it all away

can you take it all away

when ya shoved it in my face

  
  


Stupid Willow. Stupid magic....stupid Giles....stupid stupid stupid.

  
  


everyone is changing

there''s no one left that''s real

to make up your own ending

and let me know just how you feel

cause I am lost without you

I cannot live at all

my whole world surrounds you

I stumble then I crawl

  
  


What the hell is wrong with this picture? Why can't I get over this?

  
  


you could be my someone

you could be my sea

you know that I will save you

from all of the unclean

I wonder what your doing

I wonder where you are

there''s oceans in between us

but that''s not very far

  
  


Maybe cause I don't wanna?

  
  


can you take it all away

can you take it all away

when ya shoved it in my face

this pain you gave to me

can you take it all away

can you take it all away

when ya shoved it in my face

this pain you gave to me

  
  


Ugh. Why is it that Spike is the only one who even understands the concept of life and death? Nobody else even gets it.

Stupid!

  
  


Oh, Nobody told me what you thought

nobody told me what to say

everyone showed you where to turn

told you where to run away

nobody told you where to hide

nobody told you what to say

everyone showed you where to turn

showed you where to run away

  
  


Where in the hell is robbers and murderers when you need them? I could fall asleep and have a murderer come in and kill me and I would never know. Ha. Except I'd end up staking them and then have to explain to the cops why a guy showed up gutted with a wooden stake in my house. Ha.

  
  


can you take it all away

can you take it all away

when ya shoved it in my face

this pain you gave to me

can you take it all away

can you take it all away

when ya shoved it in my face

this pain you gave to me

  
  


this pain you gave to me

  
  


you take it all

you take it all away...

this pain you gave to me

you take it all away

this pain you gave to me

take it all away

this pain

  
  


Dammit. Life. Dammit. Death. Dammit all.


End file.
